This
is the Flat Eric Story.
Part
I
Eric
came to Croydon in response to controversy over the new team
leaders LAS. We thought that a puppet who could not speak, but was
universally loved was the ideal candidate.
He
was Kidnapped in December (click here
for more detailed info), and the search went as far as
Greece, Belgium and the French Pyrenees.
Freed
months later. Traumatised. Rehabilitated at Sophie's exotic
retreat, London SE13, and now very much perked up, thank you!.
Returned
to full duties, but now familiar with high speed lifestyle, opted
for M245 rapid response trial. Got a taste for the bikes, both
Honda and cannondale. (See left)
Went
to Ambex as a special ambassador for LAS special projects
division. Met
prime ministers son socially. Found collapse ? unconscious and
intoxicated, but breathing, in local toilets.
Now
disgraced Eric is to return to normal A&E duties after his
recuperation.
October
2000 the latest on flat Eric LAS |
Flat
Eric continues to stay at the heart of operational activities.
Central Ambulance control stood his vehicle down so that he could
attend the Peter Rabbit Roadshow having seen details at
www.lond.ambulance.freeuk.com/news.htm#Meetings .
He was impressed by the chief executive with his frank and
optimistic approach. Eric remained scared by the overtly hostile
body language of some managers present who sat, arms crossed,
swinging about in their swivel chairs or staring into space. Could
there be trouble ahead?
The removal of IAP as a weapon and its replacement with something
less "miners strike Vs Thatcher" has been suggested via
the official suggestions e-mail, improvelas@lond-amb.sthames
Worried none the less, Eric slipped over the county border to Kent
see photo, where he learns that a KENT PTS AP can earn more ,
Mon-Sat than
a London QAP on the worst of relief rotas.
Here
he met the fabulous Annie D'estaing, who can afford to work for
PTS Kent, and commute back to her home town Lille, Via Eurostar
from Ashford at the Weekend!
Being a soft touch for Les Femmes rushed over to France where he
quickly got embroiled in the French fuel dispute. A low resolution
French Police security camera captured Eric leading the ambulance
blockade of Paris.
This was so successful that within a week, British protesters
copied Eric, and days later, Britain was on its knees, gasping for
petrol as seen at www.lond.ambulance.freeuk.com/BPic.htm
Eric
was arrested in Paris at the request of British Security services
and extradited back to Gatwick where he is seen being sped away,
cuffed in the back of a Metropolitan Police car .
GATPOL, the Branch of Sussex Police, who police the airport
were not amused to find another force on their ground , and
meanwhile, it is rumoured that supporters of Eric launched a
rocket attack on MI6's "secret" headquarters at Vauxhall
in retaliation. (photo).
Two
minutes into the journey. Eric succumbed to a "
pseudo-fit," induced perhaps by too much camembert. Surrey
Ambulance Service recently closed Horley Ambulance station,
nearest to the airport, so a vehicle was dispatched from Sussex at
Horsham,
who recognizing our hero, demanded that the cuffs come off.
Eric
"sat on the left" for the five mile journey to East
Surrey Hospital, where he soon discharged himself, and stole an L
reg heap, (see photo) parked outside. Speeding off, we believe
towards the M25 and more adventures
continued.........................
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Mail
me. flat_eric_london_ambulance@hotmail.com
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